The Smart Way to Use Credit Cards

This post is by Stephen Guise of Deep Existence.

Credit cards are one of the most misunderstood financial instruments in the world. This is a fact—one that explains why VISA and American Express are worth about $60 billion a piece.

The interest rates on credit cards are actually illegal in many states, but a supreme court ruling changed everything by allowing credit card companies to only follow the laws of their headquarter’s state. Naturally, companies moved to ever-popular states such as South Dakota and Nevada because they had lenient usury laws.

Usury laws protect consumers from excessive interest rates. Since that supreme court ruling essentially removed them for credit cards, the rates regularly exceed typical usury limits, with one card charging as much as a 79.9% APR. Still, people are jumping at the chance to build up debt with double-digit interest rate credit cards. According to the USA Debt Clock, the USA has nearly $800 billion in credit card debt at this time.

Be on the winning side for a change

I just recently received a credit card that will allow me to take between two and four domestic round trip flights in the United States, free of charge.

Okay, it isn’t completely free. There is a $95 annual fee for this particular card. Still, I can cancel the card or negotiate that fee at any time, and I still get my flying benefits. I took advantage of a British Airways promotion that gave new customers 100,000 BA Miles (50,000 on first purchase and 50,000 after spending $2,500 in the first three months).

Before this card, I got the Amazon.com credit card. The card allows me to get a $25 Amazon gift certificate for every $833 spent on Amazon and every $2,500 spent elsewhere.

You know what things I really like? Travel and Amazon.com! So far, I have received about $600 worth of Amazon money. It was completely free. I did not spend a dime on anything I would not have bought otherwise. Later this year I will be traveling somewhere exciting for petty cash (you pay taxes for flights—usually $10 domestic) because of my British Airways card.

Why you can win

Credit card companies are statistics experts. You are a statistical probability in their eyes. They will always play the odds and come out richer as a result—the same reason Vegas always wins.

The difference between credit cards and Vegas is that we have complete control over what actually happens. I can pay off my credit card every single month on time (even automatically to ensure it). I can reap all of the benefits of the card without sacrificing much at all.

How to do it

First, have a goal in mind. Do you simply want cash back? Is there a particular store you shop at all the time? Do you want to travel? By car or by plane? There are so many different types of credit cards out there that it’d take a book to cover them all. This link is a great resource for getting started with research. The types of cards are listed in the left sidebar menu.

The idea is to find something you spend a lot of your money on and find a credit card that maximizes the rewards and perks for buying that particular thing or from that particular company. There are low interest cards out there, but if you’re looking for one of those, you’re planning on being on the losing side of the deal (paying ridiculous interest—”low” is probably actually a very high 10%).

Consider bonuses

Sometimes the sign-up bonus makes it worthwhile to get the card. For example, I have limited interest in the British Airways card, but the sign-up bonus is worth more than $1,000. This initial perk would take most cards several years to reach in rewards and it is available very soon after getting the card. Another bonus of the card is that it has no international transaction fees. So if I decide to use my miles to go to Fiji, I can use the card there without the typically exorbitant fees.

Most importantly…

Pay the card off on time. Every time.

It is literally insane to pay 10+% interest on something. Give me guaranteed 10+% interest on my investments and I’ll be rich when I’m older. Pay 10+% interest on money you don’t have and you’ll be swamped in debt in no time. You can thank compound interest for this.

Final advice

Make sure you understand the fees and conditions of the card you get. Don’t look at 12 months 0% APR and be surprised when it jumps up to 20% APR after that. I don’t pay attention to the APR because I’m not interested in paying these companies for no reason. Some great cards, like my BA card, have annual fees that are still worth it. Others have annual fees that the card does not justify.

I recommend doing as I do and “filtering” all of your purchases through your carefully selected credit card. Not only will this practice rack up some serious rewards and perks, but you’ll be building your credit score by showing you’re responsible with debt (which allows you to get better offers). I know of some people who were denied this great BA card deal because their credit score was poor.

I will leave you with possibly the best advice of all: check Slickdeals and search for credit card deals. This website gathers the best deals around the web and if there is an amazing deal out there, their community will find it. Better still, you can read the comments of people who received a similar deal before.

For this BA card, I read several stories of the miles paying for flights to Egypt, Canada, and other places that would have cost thousands. You might also read negative experiences with not being able to use air miles or other red tape that credit card companies sometimes use. If you do your research, you will get a good feel of what to expect from your new card.

VISA has been playing this game for years—but you can still beat them.

Written by Stephen Guise, who has a B.S.B.A. in Finance. When Stephen was willing to fail, he started blogging at Deep Existence. Rumor: American Express is considering giving customers the option to subscribe to Deep Existence at ATM terminals because reading the content there is almost like getting free money. I fully support this idea.

How Good Self-Esteem Leads to (Gooder) Health!

This post is by Jennifer Brown Banks of Penandprosper.

For today’s woman, there seem to be messages daily (both subliminal and overt) that suggest that we don’t quite measure up.

For example: the commercials that convince us to lose weight, strive for bouncier hair, or transform ourselves through make-overs. Messages that, like the army’s slogan, command us to “be all that we can be.”

My goal at this stage of the game? To “be all I can be” before 10 p.m.

Men reportedly don’t have it as bad. According to Artofmanliness.com, they tend to have inflated egos, rather than low self-esteem.

Meanwhile, for the woman of color, it gets even tougher, as our lifestyles, diet, divine design, and body dynamics differ from other groups.

As further proof of the pressure put on African-American women, I’d like to point out a recent survey, published in Psychology Today. It sought to convince us that women of color were deemed less attractive than other cultures, according to some reported “findings“.

Really? Have you seen Beyonce? Tina Turner? Janet Jackson? Tyra Banks? Halle Berry? Michelle Obama? Hello?! (And if this is true, why is it that other groups sometimes strive to emulate our features and fabulousness through lip injections, tanning, and other procedures?) In fact, the assertion was so absurd that I wasn’t offended. I chuckled and moved on.

But, I wasn’t always this way.

There used to be a time, in my younger years, that every slight, every criticism, every rejection, was personalized and had me doubting myself and trying to “fix” whatever had been pointed out as a shortcoming.

To add insult to injury, I often felt the need to justify my actions to others, and prove myself at great lengths and with great expense to my emotional, mental, and spiritual health.

But age brings about wisdom, folks!

I now realize that true beauty can’t be bought in a bottle. That, as Eleanor Roosevelt stated, “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.”

And the pay off? I have less stress. Fewer migraines. A good blood pressure rate. More peace of mind. More focus on things that really matter.

And you can too, (whether you’re a man or woman) if you heed the following:

  1. Recognize that we are all flawed and limited by our human nature. We have little control over genetics, mother nature, or father time.
  2. Recognize that self-esteem is a do-it-yourself project. Nobody can give you self worth; it comes from self acceptance and the knowledge that no one else is like you in this whole world.
  3. Recognize that self-esteem is like a coat of armor that shields you from harsh blows and assaults on your soul and your psyche.
  4. Recognize that perfection should never be a personal goal; instead, strive for excellence.

Yep, the better you feel about yourself, and the more at home you are in your own skin, the more you can exist in a state of liberation and peace. And that truly is a groovy and beautiful kinda’ thing.

Jennifer Brown Banks is a veteran freelance writer, Pro blogger, relationship columnist, and incurable romantic. Her work has appeared extensively online at sites such as Daily Blog Tips, Technorati, WorkAwesome, Search Engine Journal and Divorce2Dating.com. She blogs at http://Penandprosper.blogspot.com/.

FeelGooder Asks: What’s Challenged You This Week?

I don’t know about you, but this week’s been a little bit epic in my part of the world. So I thought I’d ask:

What’s challenged you this week?

Actually, I feel like that question should be, “what hasn’t challenged you this week?” For me, it’s all been a challenge!

nacho cheese

Forget your troubles...

I have some kind of weird chest infection that laid me up. I had a stack of work to do. I had clients change plans at the last minute. I had what really, truly, seemed to be unintelligible homework to complete for a course I’m taking. It snowed and I had no kindling for the fire. I had to miss appointments. I ran out of vegetables

This week—you guessed it!—my challenge has been to keep things in perspective. How did I do it? Well, I used my tried-and-tested combination of Nacho Cheese Doritos and reading good books (no kidding).

Whenever things got a little overwhelming, I’d eat some Doritos (whoever decided there were 6.5 serves in a 175g pack was crazy), read another chapter from The Death of Bunny Munro (the latest title from my fellow countryman Nick Cave), and take my mind off everything else. Even if I had to do that in a hot bath because I couldn’t light the fire.

Keeping things in perspective can be tough, but this week, I managed it! Doritos: 1, Being overwhelmed 0.

What’s challenged you this week?

Body Image as Fitness Motivation

I have a very unscientific study to share with you. I regularly ask clients, friends and occasionally total strangers to think about the happiest times of their life. I pause and give them a second to pick a moment. I wait for the smile to cross their face and then I ask them, what did you look like then?

Almost always the answer is a variation of “the best I ever looked.”

Does happiness make us thin?

My follow-up question is: what did you do for exercise then? I get a barrage of answers, and almost everyone was following some version of an active lifestyle at that time.

But first they were happy. The moving was secondary—it was just part of their lives.

When were you happiest?

Lets use this now. Go back to your happy place and your happy body image. Think about it for a second. Were you in college, running around campus? Were you getting ready for your marriage? Were you starting your first job in a new city, and collecting a circle of friends, hopping from nightspot to party?

You probably weren’t slumped in your seat staring at a computer screen…

The trick is to incorporate a bit of your old spunk into your life, have fun, and get fit while you’re doing it.

Go kayaking with a friend, actually play with your kid when you go to the park, plan a shopping day with a friend in a mall with a lot of schlepping (avoid the food court!). Take a walk with your family after dinner and see who you meet. Rescue a loveable dog. Even if you’re just standing on the sidelines of the soccer game and chatting with the other parents instead of sitting on your backside, that’s an improvement.

There are 168 hours in a week. The two that we spend doing “formal” exercise isn’t going to be enough to counteract the other 166. We have to constantly choose an active lifestyle.

So what would you choose as a talisman reminder of your happiest time? When were you happy and how did you feel about your looks then? How can you get back to that place?

Staying In the Present Moment

This post is by Justin Mazza of www.Mazzastick.com.

Letting go of the past in order to move forward is the first step to re-creating ourselves. When we dwell in the past we are giving up the precious present moment.

I’m not suggesting that you can’t reminisce about the past with your long-time friends or take time for personal reflection. But what I am suggesting is that you begin to notice where your thoughts are and bring them back to the present moment.

It doesn’t do any good to be physically present in the “now” but have our thoughts in some other time and place. We can’t change the past but we can re-frame it to something that is more empowering to us.

The past is long gone and the future hasn’t happened yet, so let’s focus where we actually have some influence.

Being present is a great way to begin to focus on and create our reality. This is how I was able to write this blog post by being present. Had I allowed my thoughts to wander, and if my actions were geared towards something else, than I would have great difficulty writing this post.

Before I wrote this post I did some mental preparation work. I made some tea, (I recently gave up coffee) lit some incense, cleared my head by doing some breathing exercises, and voila, the writing begins to flow.

This is my writing ritual that prepares my body and mind to remain present. For some of you, sitting down and writing is effortless but for me it takes a little prep work to get going. Once I am in “being present” mode I could write for hours.

You will also notice that once you master the art of being present that fears and anxiety begin to lessen, allowing creativity and energy to flow.

I remember working at a really boring job when I was a teenager. I couldn’t stay present to save my life. My mind was wandering all over the place as thoughts began rushing through my mind like a faucet turned on full blast. The flow became almost unbearable to me. I wish I had known about being present back then. Since that time I have observed some habits that cause us to stop being present.

Things that cause us to have difficulty staying present

  • Lack of sleep. Lack of sleep and adequate rest is the number one cause of accidents in our lives. Be sure to make sleeping and resting a priority. I know for some of us that this is not a problem.
  • Lack of exercise. Exercise is important for more than physical appearance. Exercise get’s the heart pumping which allows blood to flow throughout the body. This will help to make sure that your body can heal and replenish itself effectively.
  • Unhealthy diet. We are what we eat, at least on a physical level. I’m not going to get into specifics here but make sure that you are eating foods that are as close to natural as you can get.
  • Unhealthy relationships. The greatest pleasures and the worst pains are caused through our relationships. Let go of relationships that do not serve you and nourish the ones that do.
  • Stuck emotions. Emotions that are not expressed become stuck in the body and this causes emotional discomfort. It’s hard to be present if we are experiencing emotional pain.
  • Lack of variety in life experiences. Variety is the spice of life so it is important to mix it up once in a while. Routines bore me to tears.
  • Too many obligations. We don’t have to go to every social function, volunteer for every event, or stay busy all day and night. Lighten the load where you can.
  • Limiting beliefs about ourselves. Most of us carry limiting beliefs about ourselves that will diminish our life experience. Learn to let go of limiting beliefs and let yourself fly.
  • Uncomfortable environment. This can be our home, our car, our workspace. Create a comfortable environment wherever you spend a great deal of time.
  • Too many goals. I’m guilty of this one. Learn to set goals that are reasonable and allow yourself time to achieve them. We don’t have to complete ten goals a day to be happy with ourselves.

These are some things that can cause us to have difficulty staying present. If you have others to add, please do so in the comments—I would love to hear your feedback.

This post by Justin Mazza from www.Mazzastick.com where he blogs about personal development, health and nutrition, and metaphysical studies.

Last Chance: 7 Ways to FeelBetter Special Ends Today

Haven’t picked up your copy of FeelGooder’s new ebook, 7 Ways to FeelBetter?

Now’s your last chance to get it at a discount!

We’ve reached our 500-copy limit, so in 24 hours, the price will revert to the cover price of US$9.98.

But we wanted to give you a last chance to get the book for $4.99—that’s half-price. Full details of what you’ll get are explained here.

Grab your copy now!

The Art of the Compromise

I received a text from my mother the other day. She was chuckling over the little spat I’d just told her about that came off the back of hubby and I moving house.

We’ve been back and forth about what items to keep, what should go where, and what should be thrown out (interestingly, I always think his belongings should be thrown out, while meanwhile he earmarks only my things for the trash). Anyway, that’s besides the point, and was to be expected.

“Ha … step two of married life!” read my mother’s message. “Compromising!”

I assume she means that the honeymoon period is over and now we’re getting down to real married life business. The compromise.

Learning to cut a deal is an essential part of a healthy relationship.

Plenty of people hate the idea of compromise. They like things to go their way. They don’t see why they shouldn’t. Maybe you were just born stubborn (like my Taurean husband) or maybe you’re used to getting what you want (hello, boardroom managers and Generation Y*).

Well, it’s simple. There are two of you in a marriage. Both have your own completely valid opinions, and both have your own ideas of what constitutes an ideal outcome to any given situation.

There is definitely an art to compromising. Remember—the very definition of the word means that you should both be happy with the end result. It doesn’t mean that someone constantly gets steamrolled into something they don’t want to do. And it doesn’t mean that you grudgingly give in to your partner and then resent them.

Compromise is not about winning or losing. It’s about workability. And it’s about caring about how your partner feels and wanting them to be satisfied, not debating a point for the sake of it.

Keep talking

You’re each entitled to your own opinions—about anything from whether to eat Thai food for dinner down to how your children should be educated. Which means you are also entitled to voice that opinion—ideally, in a calm and civil manner.

Giving your partner the silent treatment while secretly fuming is not productive. Not telling them what you want and then giving them the silent treatment is certainly not helping either.

Keep the lines of communication open and honest and make sure you both get heard. Remember to use “I” statements and not accusing “You” statements.

Pick your battles

Ask yourself: are you just arguing over the small stuff through force of habit? Does it really matter whether your underwear gets folded a certain way? (Something I compromised on years ago after I realised my very particular husband likes things done the way he likes them done and that my sub-standard underwear-rolling was upsetting him. True story.)

Save yourself for the things that you really do care about.

Be sure you’re square

If you have to debate the pros and cons, make lists, or hash it out over a few sessions, do that. But regardless of how long it takes you, make sure you’re both happy and there’s no resentment lingering once you’ve made a decision. Be clear to your partner that you want them to be happy. They should want the same for you.

What do you think about compromise? Are you good at it? Any tips to share?

*I myself am a Generation Y, so please don’t think I’m Gen-Y-bashing! You know as well as I do that we’re used to the good life.

Think You’re Not a Runner? Think Again

This post is by Amy Karet of ActualAmy.com.

We’ve all heard how great running is for your mind, body, and spirit. I never really believed it until I took up running a couple of years ago. I was stunned by the transformation created in every aspect of my life.

After about a year of running, I was fitter, cuter, more confident, and more energetic than I’d ever imagined possible. I was calmer, a better mother, wife, friend, and employee. The change was dramatic.

But it took me 34 years to get there. I’d always been a wannabe runner. I would see these lithe, energetic people bounding down the street and wish I was one of them. But I wrote it off, deciding I was too fat or not athletic enough to run. Plus, the few times I’d gotten over myself and did run, I wound up panting, exhausted and hurt. I decided I was not born to run.

But then, a beautiful friend helped me get started the right way, and her beautiful husband introduced me to the book No Need for Speed by John Bingham. With their support and encouragement, I learned a few things that will help you go from wannabe to runner, too.

Invest in a good pair of running shoes

I heard this for years and ignored it for years, and I wore my regular old shoes every time I started an ultimately-failed running program.

But this time, I went to a running store (I know, I know. It’s embarrassing and intimidating to step foot into a place you obviously don’t belong. But I’ve found that runners love other runners, and veteran runners love helping new runners. You will be surprised and heartened by how helpful and non-judgmental they are). They figured out what kind of stride I have and whether or not I pronate or overpronate (I do one of them, but I can never remember which one.)

They got me the right shoes, and I cannot tell you what a difference it made. You’re going to be sore when you start a running program. There is no getting around that. But you shouldn’t be in pain. The time I finally broke down and got the running shoes was the first time I was able to run without pain.

Take it s…l…o…w…

This is important for everybody, but it’s especially important if you’ve ignored step number one and don’t have good shoes. Starting out slowly will decrease your chances of getting hurt, and increase your enjoyment of the process.

As complete beginners, we try to run the way we’ve seen people running: quickly and efficiently. We race out of the gate, trying to run as far as we can, as fast as we can. We end up at the ends of our driveways, panting, flushed, knees hurting, and hoping our neighbors will buy the story that we were being chased by a killer hornet.

When I say go slow, I don’t mean pretty slow. I mean painstakingly, little-old-ladies-in-walkers-are-passing-you slow. I mean molasses. I mean you are running so slowly that you could easily get where you’re going faster by walking. Slowly. If you think you’re running so slowly you couldn’t possibly go any slower, slow down just a little.

My friends call it trudging. Because when you’re first starting out, how fast you’re going or how far you can run aren’t important. What is important is getting your body used to the motion of running. It feels like you’re going nowhere. It feels stupid and silly. You already feel dumb running in front of your neighbor’s house, and then, if you’re trudging, it takes you five minutes to get past it.

It feels dumb now, but it will save your knees and your lungs and your pride in the long run. You can take off sprinting today and spend the next week discouraged and unable to walk, or you can trudge today and the day after tomorrow, and then again two days after that. (You shouldn’t run every day—your body needs time to recover.)

Not only should you run slowly, you should not run the whole time. When I was just starting out, I would walk for about two minutes and run for 30 seconds to a minute. If you’re trudging, this shouldn’t be too painful. If you are gasping for breath at the end of your minute, you are going too fast. At the end of your minute, you should feel like you could do it for another minute. You can. Just not today.

Over a period of weeks, you will be able to slowly decrease the amount of time you spend walking and increase the amount of time you spend running.

Run your own race

My mantra for the first six months of running was “It’s not about them. It’s about me.” I was worried about what the neighbors were thinking, or what the guy on the treadmill next to me was thinking. I was worried that they thought it was stupid of me, this little overweight drama club girl, to be trying to run.

When these thoughts started taking over, I’d look straight ahead and repeat my mantra.

There is always going to be someone faster or slower than you are. There will always be somebody with better or worse form. There will always be someone with cuter running clothes. There will always be the girl who looks like she knows exactly what she is doing, and you will feel stupid.

But it doesn’t matter. You are here to run your own race, live your own life. Put on your blinders and go for it full-on.

Celebrate little accomplishments

Soon, your body will get more used to the motion of trudging, and you will be able to do it a little faster. And a little farther. Before you know it, you’ll be doing two minutes of running and thirty seconds of walking.

I live just a few blocks away from a park and I used to think to myself, “Someday, I will run from my house to here.” It is not an impressive distance by any means (I’ve never actually measured it, but I know it’s less than a mile. Probably less than half a mile). But the day I ran all the way from my house to the park, I stopped and cried. I’d always wanted it, but I never thought it would happen for me. It wasn’t a world record, I didn’t do it quickly, but it was my personal achievement, and I celebrated it.

Don’t wait to call yourself a runner

I thought I wasn’t a real runner because I was too slow. Then, I got a little faster and decided I wasn’t a real runner because I didn’t do races. Then, I entered a race but thought I was too overweight to be a “real” runner. I finished a half-marathon, but then I decided that real runners run full marathons. Who knows what will happen if I ever lose my mind and decide to do a full marathon?

But after the half-marathon, I realized that a runner isn’t someone who runs races, or runs a certain speed or distance. A runner is someone who makes the decision every day to put on their shoes and go out there and put one foot in front of the other.

A runner is someone who fights those demons in her head, heart and soul and does it anyway.

A runner is someone who runs.

I promise you, if you get out there with some good shoes, take it slowly, run your own race and celebrate yourself along the way, you will be a runner, too.

When Amy isn’t trudging or pretending to be Diego with her kids, she is learning to embrace who she really is at her blog, ActualAmy.com.

FeelGooder Asks: What Are You Good At?

This week, while I was mucking around on Twitter with some friends, I reminded myself of something I’m good at. Well, I think I’m good at it. Anyway, it made me curious:

What are you good at?

I think I’m pretty good at compliments. I love to give compliments, and I really love to pass on to people compliments that others have said about them in their absence.

We’re often too shy to tell people the things we like about them—for fear that we’ll seem weird or creepy, or that they’ll take our comment the wrong way.

It’s true that you have to gauge your audience for compliments. But you should definitely give compliments. Why? Because complimenting someone in a genuine, meaningful way makes you feel good, and it makes them feel good. Woo!

This week, a friend tweeted a Facebook comment, complaining about its grammar:

“Your to gorgeous.”

I replied to him and after a little messing around, I made it into a pretty silly compliment:

“You’re to gorgeous what Einstein was to science.”

I know—stupid, huh? But when I wrote it, I imagined what it would feel like to have someone tell me that! Wow. Okay, it may be a little cryptic (my friend replied, “Haha, I didn’t get that at first.”) but still, in the right context, it could be quite the compliment.

Einstein. Science. Yeah!

So I’m not too shabby at creative-to-the-point-of-obfuscated compliments. What are you good at?

How Feeding Others Feeds Your Soul

This post is by Sheila Hart-O’Connor of www.writerathart.com.

My mother has the belief that when you’re feeling down, the best way to improve your outlook is to help someone in need.

It’s easier said than done, when all you want to do is crawl under a rock or hide away in your bed.

A few months ago, in the thick of a Midwestern winter, I got the blahs. In general, things were just not going the way I wanted. Shades of grey out the window weren’t helping either. But after a couple hours of indulging in self-pity, I thought it might be time to put those motherly words of wisdom to the test. I logged on to a local volunteer web site to see if there ways that I could put that energy to better use.

With my interest in anything environmental and my love for the outdoors, I immediately clicked on a listing for a nearby organic garden. After reading the description, I learned that this garden was a very special place. Not only was all of the food grown organically, but it was also produced specifically for low-income families. It seemed meant to be.

A greener thumb than before

I’m not a gardener. So it goes without saying that I’m not the owner of a green thumb. However, two weeks ago when the day of the event finally arrived, I went with a clean slate. I’d never done large-scale gardening, but I was really excited about participating with other people. And even more excited when I found out that they didn’t have inherent gardening talents either.

Because it was early spring, most of the time was spent weeding the garden. Toward the end, however, we did get to plant some seeds for lettuce, radishes, and cucumbers. Would you guess I actually enjoyed myself, and even learned some things about gardening along the way? I genuinely felt good about what I was doing, and I was so excited that these efforts were going to yield great, healthy food options for people who truly needed it.

The problems of a few months earlier seemed so distant, replaced by the satisfaction of an unselfish act. Mom was right!

Have you found that giving to others feeds your soul?

Sheila Hart-O’Connor is a copywriter that enjoys helping businesses and individuals build long-lasting relationships with their customers through effective and relevant online communication. Her work and accomplishments can be viewed online at www.writerathart.com.